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13 Types of Students You Meet at Medical School

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1. The keen bean: The library is a second home and they reserve their front seat at lectures a week in advance.

 

2. The Houdini: Seen at every Fresher’s week event and sports night, but as soon as lectures and tutorials start they are no where to be seen!

 

3. The ladies man: Exclusively attends based on the male:female ratio of an event.

 

4. The Jock/cheerleader: Seen at every sporting event and social lectures and patients are a hobby on the side.

 

5. The drunk: They are either a light weight or cant stop until they have drunk their body weight in alcohol. Seen as often in A/E as they are at sports night.

 

6. The cheapskate: Clears up at the freshers fair and mysteriously their turn to buy the next round never emerges.

 

7. The disorganised one: With no concept of a timetable or diary, this student plays Russian roulette to decide if they are in lectures, tutorials, clinics, ward, surgery or if it’s a day off.

 

8. The liar: Has never opened a textbook in their life, much less revise for an exam, but nails it anyway. Will lurk back long after lectures or tutorials have finished to soak as much knowledge as they can.

 

9. The nervous wreck: The mere mention of a presentation, examination, patient interaction or even a loud fart will render this poor student comatose.

 

10. Meek mouse: Always seen, but rarely heard. When they do venture to speak, be prepared to use your stethoscope to hear what they have to say.

 

12. The complainer: The moment a lecture, tutorial or timetable change occurs, be prepared for an onslaught that begins with the founder of the medical school right up to the dean.

 

13. The post-graduate: After their first degree and job, the call of Medicine was too strong to ignore. With a partner, children, commuting and studies they are the ultimate multi-tasking master.

LISTS

9 Medical Terms You Can Use Everyday To Sound Smarter 🤓

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1. Why sneeze when you can sternutate instead?

 

2. Heavy night last night? Why not tell your consultant you have veisalgia instead of saying you have a hangover?

 

3. Have you got a rumbling tummy? Surely you mean borborygmus?

 

4. Why have goosebumps when you can have horripilation instead!

 

5. Ate too much ice cream again? Do you have an ice cream headache or sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia?

 

6. Do your armpits smell foul? Go buy some deodorant to cover up your hircus!

 

7. That medical student who has been to one too many sports nights – a diagnosis of faecal encephalopathy seems appropriate!

 

8. You know when that random relative asks for a specific diagnosis for their vague sounding arm pain? Intermittent idiopathic myalgia will do nicely!

 

9. Is your nose running because you put too much hot sauce on your food? It seems like you have a case of gustatory rhinitis!

 

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LISTS

10 Types of Medical Students During Exams

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1. The genius! No notes, no papers, no pens….just listens and absorbs

 

2. The note-taker: Extensive file upon file of meticulous notes that Hermione Granger would be proud of!

 

3. The old school: Quill and parchment paper!

 

4. The techie: A minimum of Macbook, iPad, iPhone and second Macbook are needed in every lecture!

 

5. The recorder: Dictaphone and phone recordings more extensive than the CIA and FBI!

 

6. The non-attender: Works from home with a cup of coffee and Netflix breaks!

 

7. The librarian: Can be found without fail and has their own reserved table!

 

8. The mind-map: Beautiful drawings of every topic with colour co-ordination!

 

9. The list-maker: Alphabetic lists with every possible differential and treatment plan

 

10. The questioner: Question and answers are the way forward!

 

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LISTS

12 Things You Do On Your First GP Attachment

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1. Your GP practice can range from looking like a normal house…

 

2. …to the size of a mini-hospital!

 

3. History, examination and diagnosis all in 10 mins???

 

4. No more paper notes! Everything is computer logged!

 

5. Any patient can walk through the door from little kids…

 

6. …Young adults…

 

7. …and the elderly!

 

8. GPs are true multi-taskers and cover all specialties in all patients!

 

9. Some GPs have specialist interests like minor surgery

 

10. GPs can treat a patient there and then…

 

11. …refer to the hospital for a specialist…

 

12. …or in emergencies send straight to the emergency department

 

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